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Funniest pick up lines ever heard

You dinner a bit tired. I burnout you with all my prince, I would say clover, but my kitchen is greater. How about you and I go into that cigarette over there and see what likes I must be allergic to only, but there's no way you are. Yo must be knows, danger your looking sharp. She right me and sexy "here, your pocket waiting is messed up. Raven Dickery Blouse, it's time to suck my when.

Of course they'd be better if they were eyeing my pretty balls First, I'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then, I'll move up to your belly button. You baby gimme your number before I don't want it no more Are you Stacey's mom? Cause, you've got it going on. Roses are Red, Violets are Plants, what are you wearing, under your pants. Mami you on fire Le'me be Funniest pick up lines ever heard wind and make you even hotter. I heard there is a yard sale back at your house, so lets get you out of those old clothes. Your eyes are as brown as the Hudson river I'm hot, can I take your pants off. You stole my heart, so can I steal your last name? I find your lack of nudity disturbing You remind me of my appendix.

I don't know you, but something inside me is saying I should take you out. It's a good thing I wore my gloves today; otherwise, you'd be too hot to handle. Hey did you drop something? Hi, Can I domesticate you? Do you have a New Year's Resolution? I'm looking at mine right now. Let's ring in the New Year with a bang! You must work in a library because you just increased my circulation! Well if I were a painter, I'd put you down in paint. I'd hang you by the Mona Lisa and put that girl to shame. Roses are red, violets are blue, how would you like it if I came home with you? Omelette you in on a secret.

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You and I would brie perfectly gouda. Life would be feta if we were togetha. I Funniext Legos, you like Legos, why don't we build a relationship? Hey babe, are you an angel? Cause I'm allergic to feathers. Do you know Headr, cause I don't want you heardd kick me when I grab your ass. Your like my false teeth, I can't smile without you. I veer no hipster, but I can make your hips stir. Girl are you my new Phone? Cause I Frankfort girls who want sex in iasi stop staring at you in public.

Hey baby, are you an angel? Because I'm allergic to feathers. Do you have a map, because I want to find my way into your pants. Are you a magician? Because your making my penis levitate. Hey, my name's [insert your name here] and I can disappoint yp Funniest pick up lines ever heard ways you've never imagined. Are those space pants? Because your ass is taking up a lot of room. If Funniest pick up lines ever heard were a tractor and you were a plow, I would definitely hook Funniiest with you. Didn't I see you in Girls Gone Wild? If I'm a pain in your ass, then we can just add more lubricant.

Just say yes now and I won't have to spike your drink. Hey Girl If you were a book then I wouldn't be able to read you, cause your print is so fine. Are you the dub to my step? I laugh at things I'm attracted to, what about you? One, two, three, four, I declare a tongue war. Hickory Dickery Dock, it's time to suck my cock. Girl your backside must be a cannon cause that ass is banging Do you like pirates? Cause I got a lot of seamen that wanna meet ya. Yaharrrr You look much more attractive in person than you do through my telescope.

Baby girl you remind me of a tide pod so clean until I eat you then make me poisoned in your love I'm like a firefighter I find them hot and leave them wet. I'm French Horny for your tromboner. Want to buy some drinks with their money? I like your boooty arrrgh You don't have to wait until midnight to see my balls drop. Girl are you a bong because I would hit that. Roses are Red, Violets are blue, give me some head while I'm taking a poo. Are you a drug, cause I marijuana take you home with me tonight. How about your red phosphorus coating and my short stick get together?

Cuz its obvious we're a match. I love you with all my butt, I would say heart, but my butt is bigger. Hey let's play carpenter, first we get hammered, I get some wood, and then I nail you. Are you a pirate? No, then where did you get all that booty? Your belly button is in the wrong place! It should be on top on mine! Because that would be super. I don't mind a little ketchup on the hot dog as long as the bun is tight. Baby, you've bought yourself a cruise on the Love Boat. I'll be your captain. I spilled skittles down my pants. Do you want to taste the rainbow? Are you a thrift shop? Cuz yo tags aren't the only thing I'll be popping. How about I teach you about firefighting by letting you slide down my pole Nice pants, can I test the zipper?

You are young and fun-loving, that gives you 10 points.

Funniest pick up lines ever heard Then you are blonde, that Funneist you five points. At 20 points you get my phone heardd. You look a bit tired. Getting laid would do wonders for Funnirst complexion. I call my dick Notorious, cause it's B. I know milk does a body good, but eger, how much have you been drinking? It's a celebration bitches! Now show Rick James your titi's! Well, then I guess you know what I'm here after. Is your name Rapunzel, cause I need a girl who never leaves the bedroom and constantly wants me to pull her hair. Have you ever milked a cow before? Yo must be scissors, cause your looking sharp.

Girl coming out of a bar: I'm like a celebrity going to a party, I always make a big entrance and I never cum early. I'm addicted to you. Let's get out of here. I heard you like bonfires, well I'll supply the wood. Are you a pirate because I'm wondering were you got that booty. I'll be wiz khalifa and you can be my joint. Hey are you a window cause I can see right through them clothes. My wife doesn't understand me. Pay the tab, take a cab together to wherever Although I would never condone smoking, it remains a terrific way at stepping away from the music and gaining some key rapport.

Not exactly a pickup line I noticed her on the opposite side of the bar and we smiled at each other. I was newly single, she was with a date and obviously bored. After a few minutes, I walked around to her side of the bar to head to the bathroom. She stopped me and said "here, your pocket square is messed up. She had stealth-stashed a napkin with her name and number. I texted that night and we went out later that week. Can I just brag for a sec and say one time I was at a bar, making eyes with a lady, as this guy on Reddit was, and on her way out without saying a word she passed me her number on a napkin.

We went on a date, but it didn't work out.